To Bush or Not to Bush?

That is the question… But why? 

Because, unless you’re blessed with silky, short, angel hair down there, or with the world’s greatest self-esteem, chances are you’re either mildly frustrated with -- or downright hate -- your pubic hair.  Most of us fall somewhere in between or bounce around, in fact, I’ll prove it to you, anecdotally, with a story Anne told me:

Anne loves retreats.  The kind of retreats that focus on self-improvement and self-love and inner discovery, etc.  It’s one of the best parts of Anne.  During one of Anne’s latest retreats, she told me that all of the women stripped down to their buffs in an act of self – and peer – acceptance.  It sounds terrifying, yes, but I guess that’s kind of the point.

She told me she was surrounded by bush – gorgeous, beautiful, luscious bush – and it looked so feminine and empowering.  It was WOMAN, and it was something to be proud of, not to be ashamed of.

She went home on a quest to let her own pubic hair grow.  “Grow as wild and untamed as me!” she screamed to the sky, shaking her fist, while the frogs of the Costa Rican jungle rang out in a supportive chorus behind her (at least that’s how I pictured it).  

Until…*sigh… three weeks later when she texted me that she had scheduled a waxing because… wait for it…

She found gray hairs in her curly browns.

“Oh, hell no,” I said. “We’re 40 but we’re not exactly in our 40’s!”  And then I thought about my own situation: I’m a "waxxer," too.  I’m actually a "self-waxxer."  I lived out in the country for a few years and had to get real resourceful with things.  Now it’s just something I do once a month without giving much thought to.  *I will say, I do also enjoy the added flexibility it gives me.

Now, here’s why I wax:  I’m one of those girls with lots and lots of hair.  I’m talking hair every-damn-where.  And it’s especially thick and dark in my nether-region.  I could keep it trimmed, but I find that to be especially irritating.  Like, ever had someone’s five o’clock shadow brush up against your delicate cheek?  It feels like death by a thousand pokes. I guess I could keep it long, but it’s so thick that it mats down in my panties and hurts.  You know that feeling of wearing your hair in a tight ponytail, all day, and finally letting it down?  Oof.

“But Jessi, doesn’t waxing hurt?”  Sure, reader, it hurts at first.  But over time, if you keep up with it, it gets less and less painful.  It certainly doesn’t hurt as much as meeting someone's eyes that have just glanced down and caught the spider legs poking out from your bikini bottoms because you were too much in a hurry and forgot to shave.

So when Anne told me she was going back to bald, I got it.  I also “got it” when she wanted to let it grow.  Both are beautiful, and so is she.  And she, and I, and every single one of us with follicular development need to be happy with what we have going on.

At the end of the day, regardless if you have a partner or not (or you find yourself at a naked jungle retreat) you’re one of the very few people you see without your pants off.  You have to do, FOR YOU, what makes you comfortable.  Eff the rest.  Anyone that judges you for your pubic hair situation is probably projecting, anyway (bless their heart).

So, in conclusion… Grow it. Shave it. Wax it. Comb it. Braid it. Rub oil into it. Do all of these things to parts or all of your pubes.  Who cares? All of these are the right answer and none of them wrong.  Got it?

Just. Do. You.